"..every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end."

Change. God, I hate that word. In my mind it's like nails scraping against a chalkboard. Down right terrible!  For whatever reason the one thing that scares me the most, is change. I'm terrified of it. Horrified to be exact. I am completely okay with finding my niche and sticking to it. If I was told today that I was going to be a student until I was 22 then find a job and stick with it for the rest of my life, I would be okay with that. If I was told that I was going to be in school until I was 22, move half way across the world, come back to Texas, work for 20 years, move 4 times, and then settle down, you would not be able to pull me out of bed tomorrow morning. I guess I have some weird mental disorder that causes me to want to know exactly what is going to happen and when. Without an enormous amount of change, I can determine my day-to-day activities pretty accurately, and I like that. I like it a lot. I realize that without change you cannot get anywhere in life. (and my dreams of owning the Dallas Mavericks would never come true)  Also, I realize that things are going to have to change with time, and I am okay with that. I just have to deal with being extremely nervous until the change is over. As I prepare to move (aka change locations) over the next few weeks, I am going to be a nervous, scatter brained mess. Dear Lord, help the ones around me. Also, I prepare to leave work. That is hard for me knowing that this time I probably won't return. Nor will I probably ever be living in the house that I have spent the past 18 years calling home. That's a hard pill to swallow. 

On the bright side, I am focusing on interpreting change as growth. All of my dreams are coming true, and how could I be afraid of that? All of my goals are becoming a reality, and before I know it I will be right where I have spent my whole life convincing my parents that I would someday be. It's time for me to grow up and face my fear of change. Change, it's on!